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Parenting Grandchildren

The “kincare” family—in which grandparents or other adult relatives are parenting the children—is on the rise in the United States and facing its own special challenges.

Six million children live, with or without their own parents, in households headed by grandparents or other relatives. More than 2.1 million children are being raised solely by grandparents or other relatives, according to the 2000 Census. Grandparents are responsible for meeting the basic needs of their grandchildren in some 22,000 households in Oregon. Since 1990, this type of “grandparenting” has increased nationally by 53 percent. Approximately one-third of all children in foster care are in kinship care.

Unlike traditional foster parents, kin caregivers face a number of challenges, particularly in the financial, legal, and health arenas. For example, without legal guardianship or custody, kin caregivers may not be able to get their children on their health insurance.
These challenges faced by kin caregivers can be physically and emotionally overwhelming. Support groups have been shown to alleviate stress and improve health and also help reduce the sense of isolation sometimes felt by older adults raising children.

Relatives who become surrogate parents do so for many reasons, but often the children are likely to be needy, for example, to come from a neglectful home environment.
Grandchildren who come from stressed environments may have difficulty forming attachments, may act inappropriately, and may experience a myriad of negative emotions, such as guilt, grief, and fear.

Here are some goals to focus on to create a supportive environment for grandchildren:
• Provide unconditional love
• Build trust
• Use positive communication tools
• Provide strong adult role models
• Work with professionals (for example, educators and health care workers) to gain information

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Content Contact: Sally Bowman